Well, it’s time for me to write about the only thing that’s always on my mind ever since I came back home…
Now that I’m here, what am I going to do?
It is the same one question that almost all my friends were asking me, and to their disappointment I always answer: I have no idea… Well, at least not yet. I called my discipler a few weeks ago and he told me to be still and hear God’s word. Yeah, I know God will tell me in due time the very thing that He has prepared for me. Nevertheless, so far I haven’t seen the light at the end of the tunnel. I am still trying to grasp for clues and leads around me, and though there are a few paths, I am still not sure which one exactly God wants me to pursue. Even more now that the petrol price has sky-rocketed and the level of uncertainties risen to an unprecedented level, all adds up the complexities for me to decide the necessary steps that I need to take.
Then last weekend, God spoke to me one thing through a good friend that I haven’t met for ages: "You will fail if you are afraid to fail. You will fail if you don’t take any risks."
Actually when he told me this, I didn’t realize that this statement is so important. I have heard this before in sermons and books (I even put it in my earlier blog), but it never down on me until the night when I couldn’t sleep and remembered those words. The truth started to sink in: I will fail if I’m afraid to fail. I will fail if I’m not taking any risks. I realized that I am creating my own comfort zone now, and I will not be sucessful if I’m just staying put surrounded with what I am comfortable with.
More statements from the past kept on ringing in my ear: "When in doubt, do too much." "When in doubt, move."
The very next day, my sister in Melbourne called and asked me about her finance course assignment. Thanks to her, I began to open my finance textbooks and learn finance again. To my surprise, the textbook speaks of similar matter as what my friend told me the day before. In the chapter about risk & capital budgeting it stated "If you know everything about there is to know about a new product, it’s not going to be a good business. There have to be some major uncertainties to be resolved. This is the only way to ge a product with a major profit opportunity."
Now, this truth applies to both fronts: my career life and my relationship with others. I have been very afraid to charter a new path in both frontiers, and now I know that without taking adequate risks, I won’t gain anything.
Then I asked "Now that I know I have to take adequate risks, what then?" This time the answer comes instantly. I remember my good friend in Singapore always said "when you can’t see His hands, trust His heart." I believe this is the first and foremost step before we can plan our ways, because if we don’t plan anything, then Satan will give one of his to us and it is not pretty. This is also being confirmed by notes from another good friend which mentioned that one of the key to gain a success is through the power of relying on God’s providence.
So God has shown me the first step to take, and it is now up to me to move with Him… It’s time for me to trust His heart and start drafting my plan, believing that He’s with me all the way. Amen!
PS: To Yoan, Ivan, Beni, Margie, Abet & Angie… God bless you all!